Years ago a LADY (not simply a woman) named Judith Martin wrote a column called “Miss Manners” which was carried in more than 200 newspapers worldwide. The New York Times referred to her work as “an impassioned plea for a return to civilized behavior”. Etiquette is defined as: “conventional requirements as to social behavior”; synonyms are: “civility, deportment, courtesy, dignity.”
Where have these gone???
Many people scoff at the very idea of etiquette, thinking of it as being elitist or snobbish. But, who says only the wealthy or so-called « elite » can exhibit proper standards of behavior? You don’t have to be rich (monetarily) to be courteous.
My husband recently read of the current educational system in Japan. Children don’t have grading requirements in the classroom until the fourth grade. What do they do in the first three grades? They learn MANNERS! What a novel idea! They are also responsible for cleaning and caring for their own school facility. If they have to clean it themselves, I’ll just bet they take better care of it. Thus, they are taught responsibility and right behavior.
A focus on etiquette actually diminishes social problems and violence. People become more conscious of each other and the value of life and relationships.
When I was in elementary school, we lived in Florida for several years. We were not only taught in the classroom, but were REQUIRED to show respect for our teachers and elders. Not only were we not permitted to say, “What?” or “Huh?”, we were also forbidden to say, “Pardon me?” We were expected to say, “Yes, Ma’am” and “No, Ma’am”, “Yessir” and “No, Sir” and when not having heard to inquire, “Ma’am?” or “Sir?” Everyone did it so no one thought it was weird and it created an environment of respect and appreciation. Since then, I have thought many times how much we would benefit as a society if we were to continue to insist on that. Of course, now it would be considered an invasion of someone’s rights and there would be all sorts of pushback.
In our world today, Miss Manners has become more the idea of Miss(ed) Manners as we seem to have disregarded certain basic courtesies and consideration for others. So, what can we do? Pouting and throwing in the towel don’t work too well. Our best chance is to teach our children, grandchildren and those who come behind us – and to also model the proper behavior. At times it may seem like tossing a pebble into the ocean, but think what would happen if everyone did their part.
So, mind your manners!!! 🙂
“Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” (Luke 6:31)
Amen! The practice (norm) of using “Sir” and “Ma’am” is one thing I loved and respected about the south (southern natives) when I moved here.
We’ve sure changed haven’t we and not for the better. Biblical values seem to have disappeared. But you’re right. We shouldn’t just throw in the towel. There’s still something to do while we’re still here!
Right on!
Yes, Ma’am!
Don’t get me started on manners. I was thinking about 1 Peter 2:11-12 where he was speaking about keeping your conduct honorable among the Gentiles so they can’t say anything bad about you. My mom used to always tell us that good manners can take you anywhere. Of course, I grew up with social graces being taught in school, and we went to Cotillion classes. My hope is that I have a chance to teach my grand daughter how to be a lady in this world, and that she will take the hand of God and let Him lead her in ways that will please Him.