Between Two Worlds

My husband is a movie buff, having produced  many family videos and movie shorts over the years.  He enjoys all sorts of movies – including science fiction.  I am not a fan.  Though our title today  may seem to imply such a subject, it actually deals with that time when a person is aware of his or her impending death.  I have observed this in several friends and loved ones and the attitude and approach I have witnessed is vastly different than everyday man’s.

When my sister-in-law was going to appointments to discover her problem was more serious than the original acid reflux diagnosis, we were on our way home from one of those doctor visits and decided to pick up lunch at a fast-food restaurant.  Of course we got into the usual discussion over who was going to pay.  Having had cancer before, she knew what was coming and finally asked, “What am I going to do with it?”  They always say. “You can’t take it with you.”  Needless to say, she won that argument.  If rent comes due or a car payment came up later, so what?

When Dave was in the Air Force and about to be shipped out to Viet Nam, he called his mom one day.  She told him he had gotten a draft notice from the Army and asked what he wanted her to do with it.  He replied, “Tell them to come and get me.”

People who are dying might say the same thing.

One day while visiting Martha, she asked me if I would ever change anything about my life, or was I glad I had stayed home to raise my boys.  Thoughtful, probing questions about things that matter.  No time for fluff.  On another drive home, she exclaimed, “Look how RED those flowers are!”

Things get clearer.

My best friend, Nancy, had battled cancer and MS for years.  She was always a bright spot in the chemo suite, bringing smiles and hugs and encouragement to fellow patients.  When the cancer returned, she spent several days in the hospital before being sent home.  As we drove through her town, I visited her there.  No one had verbalized the end to her.  But, in her mild-mannered way she said to me, “I want you to do my service for me.”  I was almost too stunned to respond and could barely reply, “I can’t do that, Nan.”  Without hesitation and firmly but kindly, she informed me, “Yes, you can.”

There’s a different perspective between two worlds.

A few people I know ( and you probably do, too) have announced they are ready for Jesus to come for them.  They recognize their time is limited.  We don’t make deposits – just withdrawals.  Each day is another withdrawal, but there is no statement available to tell us how many we have left.

Yet, it’s different for those battling an illness who have come to the point where they know what is now imminent.  How can you and I “be there” for them without being in the way or overbearing?

In our home there are certain catch-phrases.  One is (try to) “think like they think”.  You may know someone who is currently between two worlds.  Put your self in that person’s spot.  What would you want (or, not want)?  How would you want to be treated?  I don’t think I would want someone to tell me what to do or how I should be thinking or feeling.  I think I’d want someone who was a good listener, someone who wouldn’t be solemn and sad all the time, but could still laugh and share the moment.  But, that’s only a guess.  How can YOU ” be there” for someone in that spot?

“Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.”  (Matthew 7:12)

“Be kind and compassionate to one another.”  (Ephesians 4:32)