In a previous post (Between Two Worlds 3/7/23), we discussed those who are near death and KNOW it definitively. They see things differently. Colors become brighter. Things become clearer.
It’s not the same when death seems near but, oh, so far. A dear friend of mine just turned 101 years old. She is a godly woman from whom I have learned much over the 20+ years she has been in my life. Everyone who knows her sees Christ radiating through her. She has always been a prayer warrior, trusting God through painful losses and changes as she has aged. She recently suffered a stroke and is now confined to her recliner as she waits. She is not alone. Many others endure the same fate. Only God knows when the end will come for these dear ones.
It’s as if death has put them on “Hold”. But, is that true? God gives life and He alone gives the next breath.
How do you handle this if it happens to you? Waiting is hard. My precious mother-in-law (who was a dear saint and devoted follower of the Lord) toward the end asked, “Why is it taking so long?” Are we to question God’s timing? In a moment of weakness and humanity, even Jesus said, “If possible, let this cup pass from Me” (Luke 22:42), yet then He went on to say, “Not My will, but Thine be done.”
Can we be that strong? Even those on the periphery, yet involved in caring for their loved one, can’t help but wonder: is my life on hold as death is on hold for my loved one?
My dad suffered with Alzheimer’s for many years. In the end, he was gone mentally. I begged the Lord to take him. When he passed away, I told the Lord I changed my mind and wanted him back.
The waiting room is at times a place of confusion. Why is it taking so long? But, wait: I changed my mind. When do those who remain get a “normal” life back? (The answer is never). But, then, on the heels of those feelings: the guilt for even wondering such a thing.
How can you and I get through this time? Waiting ourselves or trying to be there for someone else in this spot? Whew. That takes faith! We don’t know time frames. We can’t anticipate when death will come. We know that for some death has come too soon. For others there is a long, drawn out wait. We can’t understand all of this. In an instant, it can all change. The “hold” button stops flashing and it’s over. God knows and He has His reasons.
I’ve often thought that we will only regret what we DIDN’T do for someone, not what we DID do. And, so for those who are ready to go, we pray, we visit, we encourage, share a laugh, whatever. For those whose lives are in a holding pattern as they minister to and watch over their loved one, also pray and try to help them in whatever way relieves the pressure (spell them off, so to speak). Waiting rooms are not fun places for anyone. “When you pass through the waters, I will be with you.” So, cling to His hand and the waters “will not overflow you.” (Isaiah 43:2). He gives these moments for a reason.
“Trust in the Lord with ALL your heart and lean NOT on your own understanding.” (Proverbs 3:5)
Thank you Teri for putting into words what so many have experienced, and though we may not understand why….we can trust the One who does. May we come alongside those who are waiting with our love and support…..❤️🤗🙏🏻
Dear Teri, My heart is broken for all the obvious reasons. I love your 101 year old friend. Love, peace and comfort to all.
Thank you for this Teri. Lots of stuff to think about?
Almost always lots of pain of one kind or another! Part of life. He’s the only answer in the end! Sorry for your recent loss!
Love all daily because we never know when our time is to go be with The Lord.
Waiting . . . Trusting . . .
Too often, I am like a child expressing impatiently “are we there yet?”
Our Father knows best. In that, I take comfort.
Surely we are tendered in the shared experience.
Thank you! Jim and I visited her yesterday. Whenever I go she tells me to tell Jim she loves him…so I took him along. She was so dear …. smiled broadly at him and proclaimed her love. She’d touch his arm a few times saying, “It’s SO GOOD to see you!” The last time she gave me a side glance and said “and you, too.” like an afterthought … It was so entertaining! I’m just chopped liver next to him!
This is such a good reminder to pray for encouragement for those who come alongside those who are waiting, as they are waiting too, and need our prayers. I pray for you Teri, as you are such a blessing to our friend, and I know it’s hard to see someone you love in this situation. God’s will be done.
Your 101 year old friend has been such a blessing to everyone she comes into contact with. Still she teaches us and sets an example. Trust in the Lord. He’s in charge. All things in his will and timing. What a saint, what a friend. Thank you God.